Today is Trinity Sunday when we celebrate our belief in one God, three Persons. A good many of us were raised to believe the Trinity is a mystery that we can’t understand or explain but have to believe. While this is true as far as it goes, it risks simply being reduced to an intellectual exercise, part of a list of things we can’t prove but have to believe. This would be an over simplification of the majority report. The minority report, however, can be as personal as we want it to be, or not. In todays’ Gospel (John 16:12-15) Jesus says, “I have much more to tell you, but you cannot bear it now. But when he comes, the Spirit of truth, he will guide you to all truth”. If we are open to it, these words can be the story of our life. It’s pretty much our choice. Mystery is not something to figure out, but to be lived.
Most of us were taught that Trinity – Three Persons One God – is a mystery we cannot explain so we just have to believe, which is pretty much the majority report. A matter of the head. Of the heart, the minority report —Trinity is a relationship we can experience and live in. Whatever terms we use do not tell us who Trinity really and fully is. In fact, our terms and dogmas tell us more about ourselves than they do about Trinity. They are limited by our own experience. We are trying to understand Trinity in our own limited way, while Trinity is absolutely infinite, not limited in any way. Trinity cannot be reached or known by any process of thinking or logic. Trinity can be experienced, but as this happens we find that there are no words we can use to talk about our experience. The closest we can come is our dogmas and doctrines, and so they can take on a very personal and meaningful sense.
“The Spirit of Truth will guide you to all truth.” Spirit takes us on a journey that, at least in my case, involves a lot of kicking and screaming, and continuous letting go. Spirit teaches us truth, but it is not a matter of new data or information, although these might play a part. It is more an awareness of new insights, new and different ways of seeing the events of our every day living. Usually this happens slowly with slight changes we might not even be aware of. At times, though, the step might be a lot bigger, even monumental, life changing. A big step for me was when a few years back I had the heart attack in my car in the parking lot of where I live. It definitely was, and continues to be, life changing. As the chest discomfort increased I remember thinking, “so this is how it ends”. I also remember the response I got, “No, this is how it begins”, and the peace happened, and still is happening when I let it, when I let go. Everything changed, and is still changing. I have not been able to put it into words, other than peace.
In various ways Abba touches us, depending on our openness. Two things seem to stand out as we grow in our awareness of Trinity happening in our life: the increasing awareness that we are not, and can never be, alone, since Trinity is a dynamic relationship or interconnectedness of which we are a part; there is also an awareness of the importance of the people in our life, whether we like them or not. Each of us really is a means of grace to each other, which seems to be the easiest way to talk about Trinity happening in and among us in a beautifully simple way. There are no adequate words, and the dogma of Trinity takes on a profound and real meaning for us in our every day living.
“Spirit will guide you to all truth.” This happens in everything that is going on in my life, and I have a lot to say about how or if I accept it, especially in people and circumstances I just don’t like or want to be a part of. Guess I’m still kicking and screaming. Spirit is not concerned about my comfort zone or desire for control of my own life. Letting go never is easy, and it takes a while. Teilhard de Chardin SJ: “And yet it is the law of all progress that it is made by passing through some stages of instability—and that it may take a very long time”. I have to keep asking what do I do here and now in my particular circumstances, that makes me most open to reflecting Spirit in me?
I believe Trinity is happening in the nastiness and violence going on all around us, but I just don’t know how. It is worth noting our belief that every one of us on all sides of every question is created in Trinity’s image and likeness. Many of us just don’t get this. I can’t decide that only the people who agree with me on anything are in God’s image, every one of us is. What does this mean? I don’t know, but I believe it. Many of us, including me, are judgmental towards people who don’t agree with us, or live as we think they should. The commotion over Pride Month shows that many of us don’t accept our LGBTQ+ sisters and brothers as beloved of God just as we are. We come up with an image of Abba who thinks and judges as we do, doesn’t like the same people we don’t like, and this makes us feel good. We see this happening all around us. Is the Spirit saying something? Can I listen without telling the Spirit what I want to hear. Can I let go of my need to control my life and welcome everything as being of Trinity, even people and involvements I don’t really want?
The Spirit guides us to all truth, This is not facts, data, definitions, or information. It is more a vague and powerful “awareness” that we know but don’t really understand, that life itself is an unfolding mystery and reflection of Trinity. We want the certainty of facts and doctrines because of the sense of control they bring, and so we resist change, especially in matters of religion. The Spirit doesn’t offer us factual certainty, but invites us into an awareness of what is real and transcendent, and goes beyond simple information. There is always more questioning and doubting, wandering and wondering. It is most difficult to talk about what this really is. It is deeply personal for all of us to the extent we let it be. There are no words, but whatever it is, it is real. Teilhard: “Above all, trust in the slow work of God . . .Give Our Lord the benefit of believing that his hand is leading you, and accept the anxiety of feeling yourself in suspense and incomplete.”. He knew something. Maybe I’m learning. Just sayin . . .