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In today’s Gospel Story (Mark 6/30-34) Jesus has pity on the people, they were like sheep without a shepherd, and he began to teach them. The Psalm says “The Lord is my shepherd”. The Verse says, “My sheep hear my voice, I know them and they follow me”. In the Second Reading Paul talks about breaking down down the walls of hostility that separate us. With all that’s going around us these days, we might feel like sheep without a shepherd, lost, confused, wondering, perhaps even hurt. Are we willing to let Jesus teach us? Few of us can impact the world situation or even local ones, but each of us can do a lot of good in our daily living, and often that is tedious and difficult in its own way, even painful. How do I keep my ego out of it and instead look for the good I can do? 

This morning I woke up with these words from Billy Joel’s “Goodnight Saigon” running through my head: ”And we will all go down together”. I’ve experienced that feeling more than a few times. It’s one thing to be on the receiving end of violence, and quite another to be on the giving or returning end. Either can be a life changing experience. I’m getting that same feeling of inevitable loss now as I watch the violence happening all around me, (hopefully not in me) — world wide, national, local, as well as the violence that happens in ordinary everyday relationships. I have to keep asking, am I open to hearing Christ the Shepherd’s voice talking to me? Am I doing anything in any of my relationships that is adding to the violence around me? Am I willing to be part of someone’s healing, and not so concerned about what it might cost me? One thing we had back then that we certainly don’t have these days is a sense of responsibility to and for each other. We were looking beyond ourselves, our comfort, our convenience. We took care of each other, however we had to. These days a lot of what is going on is self-centered — it’s all about me getting what I want, at times attacking any in my way. I don’t want to go down that road. I want to bring Abba’s peace and healing to the people in my life now. I need to listen to the Shepherd and go where he takes me.

As the Gospel teaches, “his heart was moved with pity for them, for they were like sheep without a shepherd; and he began to teach them”. Is this where I am, where we are these days, like sheep without a shepherd? Am I willing to let the Good Shepherd teach me, or do I feel I already know everything I need to know? Jesus tells his disciples, “Come away by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while.” All of us need this from time to time, to get away from the frenetic 24hour news cycle and bellicose rhetoric that elevates our national blood pressure. We ask the Spirit to help us look at where we’ve been, where we are going, where we want to go. To be aware of grace happening in and around us, the reality of God loving us, to have some kind of a graced awareness of God being in our life. The Examen is a great help for this. We are surrounded by so much that clamors for our attention, not all of it good, some of it just plain ugly. Everyday relationships can be difficult and even painful. What are my priorities in all this? I need to take time away with Jesus, to let him remind me God is happening in everything, what I like and what I don’t like, what I accept and what I wish were different, in the people I like and the people I don’t like. God loves all of us precisely as we are, and God loves me precisely as I am, not as I wish I were or others tell me I ought to be, which most of us have a hard time with. I need to let Jesus remind me of this. Can I forgive people for not being as I want them to be? There are walls of hostility that separate us. Some we build them ourselves, others are built by others. Either way, they are a source of pain and division. Since I am probably involved in building them, am I willing to let the Spirit move me to tearing them down? How many walls are built simply because people don’t like themselves? When I build walls, do they protect me from others, or others from me? Others might need a wall more than I do.

Jesus tells his disciples, “Come away by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while.” We need this from time to time, letting Jesus help us look at where we’ve been, where we are going, where we want to go. As more people are finding out, Abba speaks to us in these quiet times. We are surrounded by so much clamoring for our attention, not all of it good, some of it just plain ugly. Everyday relationships can be difficult and even painful. What are my priorities? I need to take time away with Jesus, to let him remind me, even show me, God happening in everything, what I like and what I don’t like, what I accept and what I wish were different, in the people I like and the people I don’t like. God loves all of us precisely as we are, and me precisely as I am, not as I wish I were or others tell me I ought to be. Most of us have a hard time accepting this.

There is so much I don’t understand, but I accept, believing you are speaking in everything that goes on in and around me. Mychal’s Prayer says a lot these days: “Lord, take me where you want me to go, let me meet who you want me to meet, let me say what you want me to say and do what you want me to do, and keep me out of your way; if I move in a direction that is not of you, please stop me”. It can never be just about me and my comfort, which is why I need my time with the Shepherd so I can be aware of him happening. Perhaps others need it too, maybe just a few minutes from time to time.

I have to ask though, am I open to hearing your Shepherd’s voice talking to me, teaching me, or am I telling you what I want to hear? Is there something you’re asking me to do? Am I doing anything in any of my relationships that is adding to the violence around me? Am I willing to be part of someone’s healing, and not all that concerned about what it might cost me? Am I willing to be led to places, situations, relationships that I would not of myself choose, or even don ’t want, in the belief that Abba is moving me to where I need to be for some reason whether I understand it or not? Can I go to the place inside me where I know there is peace and live from there? Just sayin .  .  .